Lisa-Jo Baker has a blog that I love to read. She has this thing on Fridays – Five Minute Friday. You guessed it; write for five minutes straight. No editing. No re-do. She gives the topic and you just write. Then you link it up to her site, comment on the other link-er before you and boom-hundreds of bloggers are writing about the same subject on the same day.
Today’s Topic: WELCOME
I feel awkward and out of place. I feel like they can all see right through me. Can they see my scars?
What are we going to have in common? Outside of our children, our lives are very different. I try to remember that the grass only seems greener on the other side, but I’m pretty sure their grass truly wins in my self made comparison.
I’m trying to be social, to establish myself in a community, but yet I still don’t feel welcome. I feel weird and that I don’t belong.
It’s nothing they’ve done. They’ve been nice. They’ve smiled and tried to engage me in conversation, yet I feel like I’m wearing a Scarlet Letter S-for suffering.
I’m young. It’s not normal. I’m not normal. My family isn’t normal.
My hands are in my pockets and my arms are crossed. I’m sure I’m giving off the vibe that I don’t want to be here.
It’s not the case at all. I’m lonely. But, who wants to hear my sob stories all the time? I’ll be the life of the party sharing about stand and pivots, wheelchair ramps and physical therapy.
The thing is I’m not normal, but neither are any of them. They all carry their own burdens, their own stories, their own awkwardness. They’re all scared to put themselves out there, but it’s about growing up, growing out and growing together. It’s about building community and sharing and carrying each others burdens.
And, we decide to put aside our fears, talk about our Scarlet Letters and not sit in judgement of one another.
We’re friends. We’re fearless. We’re free. We’re welcome.