A brain injury can alter someone’s behavior, their self-control, especially in an emotionally charged moment; frustration, anger, hurt, confusion.
You never know when it’s coming, but you know it’s always a possibility. So, you walk on eggshells trying to make life go smoothly by accommodating them so you can avoid these outbursts.
You begin to think that you’re out of that stage of recovery when out of nowhere it happens again.
And, you don’t understand. It doesn’t make sense to you. Your heart retreats further back; it’s walls raising up a bit more in defense.
Yet, it’s not just you. It’s him; the little one whose hand slips into yours as you watch in wonder and confusion the darkness that has slipped in to that moment. The one whose eyes look to yours for explanation, but you have none.
Yet, it’s not just you two. It’s the daddy too.
He can’t control it, filter it or stop it. It has to run it’s course. But, he won’t remember it happened or what he said.
We will remember; me and the little one whose hand I hold.
And, we wait knowing it simmers under the surface, but hoping that the One who created all of us, will stand in the fire with us and in the end, we will all walk out unscathed.